Fear and Wanderlust

“There’s fear that keeps you alive. And there’s fear that keeps you from living.  Wisdom is knowing the difference.”–David Swenson

For a number of years, I have been absolutely obsessed with the idea of traveling the world.  I want to wander among natural wonders, see far off vistas up close, experience different cultures–totally and completely immerse myself in lives different from my own.

The only problem is, with all my wanderlust, I have yet to actually do this.  Sure, I’ve been to a few places–taken a few vacations worth writing home about.  But nothing compared to what I actually yearn to do.  I’m at the point where I have to ask myself why.  Why have I never taken that leap?

One of my greatest fears is reaching the end of my life and looking back, disappointed that I never saw all I needed to see.

Yet, it’s fear that holds me back.

There’s always something, some excuse:  I was in school, it would be too expensive, I’m afraid of traveling alone, it wouldn’t be right to leave my fiancé for such a long time, what would I do with my things, I’m terrified of flying, etc., etc.  I’ve never lacked for excuses.  Somehow I have to find a way to overcome these fears–I have to figure out how to just do it.  And once I figure it out, I need to do just that–I need to just do it.

I’m a little stuck here.  I’m one of those people that hashes and rehashes every available option until just thinking about it gives me a headache.  And then I stop–I stop thinking about it, I stop planning, I just stop.  It’s one of the unfortunate side effects of my tension bound, type-A personality; my self-diagnosed generalized anxiety disorder; my inkling of OCD.  Ha, it seems I did learn something from my undergraduate education–a lot of ways to label myself.

All joking aside, I seriously need to do this.  I need to travel, see the world, explore this passion.  HELP–Where do I even begin?

photo credit: graphistolage

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